How To Keep A Conversation Going - The 10 Simple Steps

August 27th, 2008

The art of conversation really is a wonderful skill; the simple skills to keep a conversation alive can be the deciding factor to how successful you are going to be.

Starting a conversation and maintaining a conversation really are two separate factors. As with anything there is a start, middle and an end.

Below are some tips that will help you to keep any conversation alive:

1. Don’t be a conversational bully. Avoid making people feel as if they are forced to listen to what you have to say.  Shouting and raising your voice won’t get you listened to.  It will just frustrate you and the other party involved.

2. Learn the difference between conversation and speech.  These are 2 very simple things to get mixed up on, whilst giving a speech you are being listened to. When one is having a conversation then 2 parties are involved! A conversation is word exchanges between 2 or more people.

3. Don’t shy away from phone calls. A lot of people shy away from phone calls don’t hide when the phone rings its great practice for talking face to face.

4. Questions are the key.  Yes keep the conversation a drift and flowing with questions! Questions are excellent for making the conversation continue. Even if you are really fed with the topics just act as if you are interested by generating questions.

Some excellent questions for keeping the conversation afloat are:

Who?

What?

Where?

Why?

When?

How?

Really?

Is it?

Do you like…?

These suggestions might seem rather random; however try them out in a test run and see the results.

5. Don’t be boring. If you are on a date and need to impress, then being boring is a big no-no! You won’t even know when you’re boring the other party. Try to avoid subjects that are all about you: how you are good because you did something etc.

6. Perhaps you will feel tempted to brag or turn the tables and start talking about you ex girlfriend or boyfriend. On a date this is a crime; you really can’t do this.

7. Talk about the other person. A great way to keep the conversation going is to talk about the person that you are talking to! Pay an interest into their upbringing, social values, and way of life. If you show interest to the other person then the conversation will never die!

8. Be interested but don’t be nosy. Know your limits, gossiping and extracting information from people with nosy behaviour is extremely frustrating. You most certainly won’t be getting a fan club by behaving in this manner. People won’t want to merge in conversation with you again. Nosiness and gossiping is the final wave to a healthy conversation flow.

9. Don’t pretend. Learn when the subject of conversation isn’t something that you’re comfortable or familiar with then politely change the subject; pretending that you are interested in something and know about that thing, is a recipe for failure.

10. Be lively. Talk with energy and incorporate fresh new topics to the conversation. Talk about recent news flashes, what’s happening in the world.  For example if you start a conversation on the topic of politics, it’s sure not to end anytime soon!

You should feel privileged with the gift of talking. Don’t build up barriers and unnecessary obstacles to stop you from words of conversation. If you follow the above tips then you will notice improvements in no time at all. Conversation should be fun, to interact with people and to engage in talk is a way of life. Once you can talk and keep a conversation going, you can be sure that you will be able to maintain good relations with friend and relatives.

5 Powerful Ways To Express Your Ideas And Opinions Clearly

August 25th, 2008

Are you fed up of the everyday trials of life, perhaps struggling to express your thoughts and opinions? These days people want to talk and not listen! It can all become too much in this day and age no one wants to be a shadow in the crowd having your thoughts and opinions heard is a priority.

The very achievement of being able to express yourself and more importantly be listened to is an extremely rewarding feeling. Just how can you express your ideas and opinions clearly and maintain that you are listened to?

Below are some factors that will help you to voice your opinions and ideas:

1) Know what your aim is

Make sure that before attempting to open your mouth and the words begin to flow that your 100% clear on the ideas that need to be expressed. Knowing where you want to go with the conversation will help to give you that extra confidence boost.

When your audience can see that you are confident then they will be more alert and want to listen.

2) Ignore the definition of perfection

Just sit and ask yourself, exactly what is perfect? Is there anyone out there that is 100% perfect? The fact is that we are only human and the reality is that not one of us is perfect without flaw. A small error is acceptable, there’s no need to be stringent to the point that you begin to struggle voicing your opinion! As long as you know the topic of importance, a simple error can be overlooked.

3) Keep it basic

Think why you cut off when someone is voicing their opinion; remember your days at school and college with teachers lecturing in front of the class.  Being lectured is boring!

There really is no need to use big words. The simple facts voiced in an exciting manner will be more than enough to keep the audience tuned in. It’s extremely annoying to have someone chatting away for 30 minutes, when the conversation could have been kept basic ending in half the time.

Stay on the straight and narrow; turning left and right really is not going to turn into a success story. Don’t make the listeners fall asleep!

4) Pretend that you are alone

One of the major fears of having to express your opinion in front of a crowd is how you will be perceived by the audience.  Can you really afford to let negativity like this get in the way?!

Picture that you are alone and voicing your opinion to yourself! Your nerves will remain calm and allow you to remain focused on the topic that you need to address.

5) Revise before you talk

Yes simple revision of your conversation will help you take it to the next level. The very factor that you are confident and know what you are talking about will help significantly.

When people that you’re talking to know that you certain on what you’re expressing then they will have faith in you.  Think about possible questions that might arise from your topic of conversation and have the answers readily prepared in your head!

Learning to voice your thoughts and opinions really is a simple process, we are all human and each of us has worries and fears. Talking should be fun not a drag; you should have confidence in yourself. If you know that the topic that you are addressing is of relevance than don’t fear! Let the words flow.

By reading the above tips and putting them into practice you will be able to become a lot more confident and expressing your thoughts and opinions will become a piece of cake!

7 Simple Ways To Be Interesting To People You Meet

August 23rd, 2008

In the world of food, it’s said that they first bite is with the eyes. Well, when it comes to meeting new people, a first impression is a lasting impression, and it’s important you make a good one.

After that, you have to work at holding their interest. Let’s look at some steps you can take to ensure you do just that.

1. First impressions count

When you meet someone new, they’re going to size you up before you even open your mouth. So, be sure to bathe, shave (whether it be your face or legs - depending on your gender), apply some aftershave and anti-perspirant and maybe some cologne or perfume.

Pick out a nice outfit; something appropriate for the situation you’re going to be meeting people in, and that is in style. After all, going to a business forum in a suit twenty years out of date is not going to impress people.

As to the situation; if you’re going to a beach volleyball party, long pants, a shirt and a tie is a tad too fancy. So, dress appropriately.

2. Body language

Nothing says “I don’t want to talk to anyone” like sitting off in a corner, your shoulders hunched over, and your arms crossed. To get people interested in talking to you, you need to be out among the crowd and make your body language open to others.

3. Your face

This goes along with body language. If your eyes are cast down to the floor, if your expression is blank and without emotion, that does not signal friendliness to others.

So, paint a small smile on your face, and hold eye contact. Don’t go overboard! A huge ear to ear smile might be seen as forced and downright creepy. Also, holding eye contact too much can be seen as you trying to intimidate anyone you talk to.

4. Be friendly

Speak in a steady, even tone. Don’t whisper, and don’t raise your voice - at least not without reason.  After all, if you start telling an interesting story, you’ll want to give inflection to your voice to make it a really entertaining tale. But, with new people who don’t know you, you don’t want to chance scaring them by going overboard.

5. Ask questions

There’s nothing in the world people like more than talking about themselves. So, ask people about them; and then pay attention to what they say. If you ask good follow-up questions, it shows that you’re paying attention; people like that.

6. Be prepared to participate

Yes, people like to talk about themselves, but eventually they’re going to want to hear from you. So, do a bit of prep work. Study current events like politics, movies, pop culture and be ready to talk about them.

Do you have some amusing stories to tell? Have you just returned from a vacation, and can talk about where you went and what you did? People always enjoy a good story.

7. Don’t monopolize the conversation

You may have a ton of jokes and funny stories to tell, but come up for air once in a while. Let other people talk.

Along those same lines, don’t talk about just one thing; that can get dull.

If the other person brings up another subject, don’t feel the need to steer the conversation back to what you were talking about before; be flexible.

Holding the interest of others can be a challenge, but it’s not impossible. Pay attention to your appearance, your body lanaguage, and how you converse with them. Do all these things, and you have a good chance of being a success at interacting with new people.