Archive for July, 2007

Great Ways to Influence People

Wednesday, July 25th, 2007

We all have our own mentors - people who, in one way or another, has played a big role and influenced us in the way that we perceive things. At some point in your life, you will also find that what you have done or said has a way of influencing people. In these two cases, you will see that there is a way for you to influence people and it will benefit you if you know how to use this skill to your advantage.

There is actually no right or wrong way to influence people. The important thing when trying to influence people is that you are going for a positive result. Your success as a leader or part of a group, as well as in life in general, will depend on your ability to influence people and affect their lives in a positive way. To have a deeper understanding of how you can influence people in a positive or productive manner, take a look at the following:

1. Get your message across.

Take a manager for example. If an employee under his supervision is often late arriving to work, how can he influence this employee into improving his or her performance at work? The first thing that the manager needs to do is set a good example. By showing up on time, you are sending the message that you may be the boss but you are not exempted from the company rules - even with something as simple as coming to work on time. This way, the manager can influence the employee by being a role model and setting a good example.

2. If a person is behaving inappropriately, dig deeper into the reason for such behavior.

Influencing people into your way thinking does not - and should not involve manipulating, bullying, punishing or harassing. There should be a motivation behind such behavior, and punishing them into submission will not give you the results that you want. Find out what the reason is behind all of it. Listen to their problem and have them explain the situation to you. Only then can you make an intelligent decision and take steps on how you can change their mind into your way of thinking.

3. Explain the results that you would like to see and get feedback.

If you are a leader in a sales company, for example, you all have a common goal to meet as a company. If your employees think that you are only in it for the money with no deeper motivation, you may not influence them into thinking that they should work hard enough
to make the company profit. To influence them into meeting the goals that you have, explain the results that you would like to see. The process should not end here, because you also need to gain feedback to learn if the goals are realistic, or if the methods that you want them to use are at all feasible.

4. Learn how to listen and communicate effectively to influence people in a positive way.

Influencing people is not just limited to the workplace. Even as a parent, you can try to influence your children into living the kind of life that you would like them to have. As a friend, you may not always agree with your friend’s actions but you should always be there for them to support whatever decisions it is that they make. Listening and learning how to communicate effectively will make you influence other’s lives because of a deeper understanding that you will have on what motivates them, which in turn will give you an idea on how to deal with a particular situation.

With these in mind, you can learn how to yield positive results in the way that you influence people, so that you can be successful in reaching the goals that you have set for yourself and for others.

free communication skills report

How to Win Friends and Influence People in 3 Easy Steps

Tuesday, July 24th, 2007

Can you count on the fingers of one hand the number of true friends that you have? Would you like to increase your circle of friends and prove to yourself that you have ‘people skills’ and you can get more people to like you? This may be easier said than done, especially if you are the loner type - but there are steps that you can take in order to win friends and influence people.

You do not need to entirely change who you are just to make other people like you. What you can do instead is to ‘adjust’ your attitude so that you can ooze that self-confidence that a lot of people would like to attain, without being over-the-top. At the same time, you can take on a positive way of thinking and attitude so that you can attain these two goals: by learning how to win friends and influence people. Take a look at the following easy-to-follow tips which are a sure-fire way of attaining your personal goals:

1. Learn how to take risks.

When you walk into a room full of strangers, do you just go straight to your destination, sit and mostly keep to yourself? If you do this, you may think that you are saving yourself from rejection or hurt - but you are actually doing the opposite. By not taking a risk and sticking to your old habits, you are sending a message to other people that they should stay away from you. However, if you smile, take a general sweep of the room and try to make small conversation with a friendly stranger, you are sending a message that you are easy to talk to.

2. Remember that it is not all about ‘you’.

When talking with a first-time acquaintance, do you often find yourself talking about nothing else but “yourself”? Remember that the person that you are speaking with has his or her own life, too. In order for you to win friends and influence people in a positive way, you need to learn how to initiate a two-way conversation.

After saying a little about yourself, encourage the person that you are talking with to tell you something in return. This is where your knowledge about a wide array of topic becomes useful. Once you find a common ground, you can talk about that and take the conversation from there. If you are joining a group of people, try to inject some humor into the anecdotes that you are sharing, and encourage other people to do the same so that you will not dominate the conversation.

3. Be as sincere and honest as possible.

In the course of interacting with people, you will find that those who are most honest and sincere have the most number of friends. If you are not one of those ‘people magnets’, you can take a small step and start being one by being a little more open with your interactions with other people.

A little honesty will go a long way, and you may even be surprised at how much people are willing to share once they see that you are genuinely interested with what they have to say. Maintaining eye contact, remaining polite with your gestures and trying to make other people feel as comfortable as possible would also help a lot in making people like you.

In learning how to win friends and influence people, you do not necessarily that you need to create a new ‘you’ just to make other people like you in turn. By staying humble, injecting a little sense of humor into your conversations and maintaining a positive frame of mind, you are bound to attract new friends and influence people to widen your social circle and live a fuller and better life.

free communication skills report

How to Communicate Much More Effectively in 3 Simple Steps

Monday, July 23rd, 2007

Knowing how to communicate is an essential life skill. Take your career as a case in point.If you are being interviewed for a job and there is another candidate who is more or less your equal when it comes to skills and knowledge, one of the factors that will surely give you an edge is how you handled yourself during the interview. Sometimes, even if you are not 100% qualified, once the interviewer is satisfied with the way that you answered the questions, you will most likely be accepted for the job.

However, not everyone is blessed with good communication skills. Some people just naturally get their point across more effectively than others. This is the reason why you need to take steps and exert some extra effort in learning how to communicate effectively, so that you would know how to handle yourself in a personal and professional environment. Take a look at the following tips on how to communicate effectively:

1. Do not just hear, learn how to ‘listen’.

Communication is a two-way street. If a person says something to you, you are expected to give a response in kind. It may sound elementary, but often times, people forget how to listen - instead, they just choose to ‘hear’ the message instead of delving deep into what
is actually being said. If the meaning of the message is distorted due to a misunderstanding on your part, it will result to miscommunication. The rule of thumb is, listen first to what is being said, then formulate your response from there.

If you merely hear the words being uttered while you are actually thinking about what you are going to say next, then you are not being a participant to an effective two-way communication process. Finally, once you realize that you are actually ‘getting’ what the
other person is saying, a corresponding response will automatically come out of your mouth.

2. Be observant while you are being observed in turn.

If, for example, you are in a situation where you need to speak in front of a few friends or before large audience and you find that you are suddenly the center of attention - and people are eagerly awaiting your response - do not panic! Understand that public
speaking is one of the most common fears of a lot of people, so you are not alone in this dilemma.

Fear cannot be conquered if you do not ‘force’ yourself to face it, and the sooner you start, the better. Take a deep breath and start looking at the people around you. Are they straining to hear your voice? If they are, increase the volume of your voice a little. Do they appear restless or uninterested? Try varying your pitch, inject humor into what you are saying to get their attention back, or ask questions to get them more involved. You, in turn should learn how to gauge their reaction. With an attentive audience and an observant speaker, the communication between both ends should flow easier.

3. Choose your words carefully to clearly get your message across.

The purpose of communication is simply this: to send a message and make sure that it is clear and understood by the receiver. Whether you are engaged in a one-on-one conversation or if you are speaking before a group of people, you need to choose your words carefully so that your message will be understood. If you find a certain point particularly difficult to describe, use a common scenario by which you can compare the idea that you are trying to impart. If questions arise during the course of the discussion, answer them straightforwardly.

By following these tips on how to communicate effectively, you will certainly overcome any fear of speaking that you might harbor deep inside. Also, your goals - whether it is simply a matter of expressing an opinion, asking someone to do something, or persuading an audience into your line of thinking - they will be realized once you learn how to succinctly get your message across.

free communication skills report