Monthly Archives: September 2007

4 Great Ways to Go Beyond Shyness

Do you feel that extreme shyness is taking over your life and you just cannot stand in front of a crowd or even enter a room full of strangers without a feeling of insecurity assailing you? Each person does have some level of shyness within themselves, but it is never healthy when you let the fact that you are shy hinder your social, professional and personal interactions with other people. Therefore, it is vital to go beyond shyness and overcome your fears and insecurities so that you can have a thriving social life. Here’s how:

1. Think beyond the box.

Most shy people have all these fears and insecurities that is why they are extremely hesitant to speak their mind out, mingle with strangers, or interact with a person whom they do not already know. The reason for this is that once they are assailed with their self-doubts and insecurities, they fail to think outside of the box by thinking that they are the only ones who feel this way. If you are extremely shy, you need to remember that nobody’s perfect and that other people have insecurities and self-doubts, too.

However, the difference lies in the way that we let these feelings affect the way that we deal with other people. Most of the ‘people’ persons actually have a ‘Who cares?” attitude to some extent. So what if you make a mistake or if you commit a blunder in front of other people? The important thing is for you to keep your composure, to remain polite at all times and make sure not to offend anybody – and finally, have the ability to laugh at yourself and find humor in the situation.

If you keep on having these straitlaced ideas that you need to be all prim and proper when in the company of others because you will be embarrassed to death if you do not – it will prevent you from being spontaneous and having a chance to take things lightly and essentially have fun when socializing.

2. A little smile goes a long way.

People are attracted to other people who have a positive way of looking at things. When you enter a room with a smile on your face, you will ooze a confidence and friendliness that people will respond to. Although you may feel all nervous inside, your shyness in front of other people will be diffused once you smile and you see the positive response that your attitude will gain from other people.

3. Arm yourself with knowledge on a wide array of subjects.

You can definitely go beyond that feeling of shyness once you arm yourself with knowledge on a broad area of subjects. Sometimes, shyness is rooted from the simple fear of not having anything ‘intelligent’ to say. To counteract this, you need to read, watch television and basically expose your mind to a wide range of topics – from the latest showbiz or political scandal, to the arts, music, film, books – even mundane subjects like traffic and the weather is good enough to start a conversation with.

4. Feel good about yourself and your positive attitude will ooze out and affect others.

Shyness is stemmed from self-doubts and insecurities. If you get rid of these negative thoughts and feelings and just decide to have a different, more positive outlook in life – then it will show on the outside. This is your key towards going beyond shyness and learning to love people and life in general.

Shyness on any level is something that you need to get over with. Do not let shyness hinder you from having a fruitful social and personal interaction with others. By practicing the aforementioned ways of thinking, you can adapt a positive attitude of going beyond shyness – and enhance your interpersonal skills in the process.

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Get Rid of Shyness in 4 Easy Steps

Is shyness a sign of lack of self-confidence? Maybe. For some people, shyness can be rooted from the fact that they do not have enough faith in themselves to have the ability to face other people. For others, on the times that their insecurities resurface, they feel that they are not good enough to interact or speak with other people and this is when shyness sinks in.

If you have always envied that person in your office that is everyone’s best friend, or if you just wish that you were as good a public speaker as the most admired politician – then you need to get rid of shyness now! Below are some useful tips on how you can turn around shyness:

1. Go out and mingle

If you are always cooped up in that lonely apartment of yours, how will you have the chance to mingle and meet other people? If your social life is limited to the friends that you have had since you were kids, then you are not giving yourself the opportunity to broaden your horizons. Going out and mingling is the number one way to get rid of your shyness since it will give you a chance to try and feel as comfortable as possible when in the company of a new set of friends.

2. Attend to Body Language

Mind your posture, smile and try to at least look relaxed in the company of others.

If you look rigid, if you are always staring afar, or if you always keep your arms closed to yourself, these are dead giveaways that you do not want to talk and mingle. Your body language says a lot about the way that you feel at the moment. If you always keep your arms crossed and you hardly smile or glance at the crowd, you may even give out the impression of being rude when in fact, you are just trying to get over your shyness.

When in a party, for example, smile the minute that you walk into the room. Try to look as relaxed as you can on the outside so that others will not feel that you are uncomfortable in their company. Nobody will guess what you are thinking anyway, and they will not feel your shyness or nervousness as long as you maintain a relaxed front.

3. Go to personality development classes

If you do not have the discipline or the will to try and get rid of your shyness by yourself, a personality development class will be of great assistance to you. Here, you will learn how to walk, talk, dress and behave when in the company of coworkers, superiors and even your friends. By taking classes, you will gain a lot more confidence and you will have professional tips on how to get rid of your shyness and basically learn to feel better about yourself in general.

The investment will surely be worth it in the end because you will gain enough confidence to get over your insecurities and self-doubts and reach your goal of overcoming shyness.

4. Self Help and Personality

Understand that getting over a deep-seated shyness may take some time, but it is workable and there are different solutions for getting over shyness – depending on the personality that you have.

What works for one may not necessarily work for you. Sometimes, no matter how many self-help books you read about overcoming shyness, all these ideas in your head will not necessarily work for you. If one method fails, try another one. Do it one step at a time. If your first ‘public outing’ to overcome shyness is a disaster, try moving one step back by practicing in a more intimate environment. No matter how tiring a trial-and-error process may sound like to you, at the end of the day, reaching your goal of fighting against shyness will be worth all the effort.

With these tips, you can slowly get rid of shyness so that you can have more meaningful social and professional relationships and start feeling better about yourself.

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4 Simple Cures for Shyness

If you think that shyness is a ‘normal’ condition that you just need to endure, think again. People who are painfully shy miss out on a lot of things in life – from personal relationships, to job opportunities, to
self-development. In extreme cases, shyness can manifest on the outside, making a person palpitate, blunder on his or her speech, and be visibly apprehensive. Shyness on different people could have different levels and causes, but the main point is that shyness is a hindrance to your social, personal and professional growth. Here are some of the steps that you can take as a cure for shyness:

1. Do not let your fear of any social interaction get the better of you.

Shyness is rooted from the fact that you have a lot of doubts and insecurities about yourself. Just like the cliche which says that you have to love yourself before you can love somebody else – you need to be confident and comfortable about who you are as a person. You will slowly see, once you take on a different attitude within yourself, that by gaining a lot more confidence with yourself, you can slowly but surely overcome your shyness. It is never healthy to let your fear of social interaction take over your life, to the point that you cannot realize your full potential.

2. Try to get out of your comfort zone and cultivate new friendships.

Cultivating new friendships is one of the best cures for shyness. If you always mingle with the people whom you already know, there is no chance to better yourself and get over your shyness. Go out and try to meet as many people as you can. This can serve as your ‘practice’ ground for social interaction. Another thing that you can do is reward yourself once you take a small step in getting over your shyness. These self-rewards can serve as your motivator so that you can slowly work towards getting over your shyness.

3. Determine the root of your shyness and take steps towards conquering your fear of interacting with other people.

If your shyness roots from the fact that you are afraid of making a speech blunder, just like when you are speaking in public, then the solution would be to practice conversing with other people on a casual environment. If your shyness roots from insecurity about your clothes or your appearance, try to look for ways on how you can improve your looks so that you can feel a lot better about yourself.

A ‘makeover’ that starts from the outside will make you feel great about yourself on the inside as well. Another root cause of shyness is insecurities – probably from something about your past or your background that you are quite ashamed of. Do not let the past haunt you for the rest of your life. No matter how difficult it may seem, there will come a point when you would need to get over what happened before and move on. By determining the exact cause of where your shyness is coming from, you would have an idea of how you can cure it.

4. Ask the help of a friend if you need to so that you can cure shyness.

Do not force it. If you do not have enough self-discipline to get over your shyness, then ask the help of a friend. It may take a little while before you can completely get over your shyness but as long as you
continually work on it, you will slowly but surely achieve your goal – preferably with the help of a friend.

They always say that the people that we meet would somehow make an impact with our lives in one way or another. With these tips which are a great cure for shyness, you can start reaching out and enriching your life by filling it with people who will make your life more meaningful.
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