by Peter Murphy
It can take skill to deal effectively with negative people.
Make sure you are ready for the challenge by reading and
using these tips.
1 Don´t Believe Everything You Hear!
With close friends and family it is not unusual to think
that you ought to take onboard everything you hear. However
do not confuse caring with knowing. Just because someone is
concerned for your welfare does not mean that their advice
or input has value.
For example, I know a lot about peak performance. I do not
know much about car maintenance. If I ever offer you advice
on rebuilding a car engine run as fast as you can!
My input would have little or no value. Likewise with
friends and family. They may be negative about you, your
plans and your opinions simply because they lack the
knowledge to think positively about the situation.
Their ignorance causes them to fear for your welfare.
Distinguish between caring and the knowledge to offer
2 Let Go Of Needing Their Approval
I have mentioned this principle many times before because
it is so important. As long as you must have the
permission, approval and acceptance of your peers you are a
victim of their limiting beliefs.
You must let go of wanting approval if you are to ever have
peace of mind. Refer to my book for more help with this.
See Lesson 15 – Letting go of wanting your own approval.
3 Eliminate Your Own Negative Thoughts
Often friends reflect back the negatives you quietly hold
inside your own mind. If you were 100 per cent positive
about your life and your plans it would not matter if
people close to you were negative.
In fact their negative comments might even make you laugh
because their opinions would seem so absurd to you. You can
become more positive by reading books that expand your
knowledge and understanding, spending more time with
positive, dynamic people and by stretching yourself daily.
By stretching I mean challenging yourself to perform better
than your previous best. When you make stretching to be
more part of your life, your belief in what is possible
grows and grows at a furious pace.
Before long you will not have room for negative thoughts.
Choose to find a positive in all things and it quickly
becomes a habit that will transform your experience of life.
I am always asking myself:
— what is good about this?
— what is great about this?
— what have I learned from this that makes me stronger?
Ask yourself the right questions and redirect your mind
back onto the positive.
What else can you do to take charge of even the most
Review the Conversation Fear report that comes with my book
If you ever know what to say and still cannot speak up it
is because fear has gotten the better of you. This fear
will not go away until you know how to eliminate it. I show
you three ways in that report.
Make sure you are up to date on the 15 ways to start and
keep a conversation going. I showed you how to do this in
the How to Start a Great Conversation with Anyone report
that you get with my book at:
Have a great week,
Peter Murphy is a peak performance expert. He recently
revealed the secret strategies all high achievers use to
communicate with charm and impact. The same techniques you
can use to overcome shyness, develop great conversation
skills and build self-confidence.
Click here now to take a test drive: