When you meet new people if you tend to be
cautious you may tend to wait and see what the
other person is like before opening up.
Although that seems logical it is in fact a very
negative way to engage in conversation. It means
you hide your personality, you wait for the other
person to lead and you are passive in seeing how
it all works out.
Anyone who knows how to charm people approaches
winning friends very differently. Here are three
secrets to winning friends that work like magic:
1. Assume you like the person
When meeting new people assume they are likeable
and interesting unless they prove otherwise. This
assumption will cause you to warmly open the
conversation on a friendly, positive note.
The other person will pick up on your acceptance
and positive attitude and be much more willing to
get to know you.
Do this and you virtually guarantee a great
connection right away. The conversation then
takes on a life of its own.
2. Expect to find interesting conversation topics
This attitude of positive expectancy makes it
much more fun to meet people. It becomes like a
treasure hunt – what interesting experiences or
knowledge will you find?
When you are clearly enthusiastic about getting
to know people they will respond in kind. People
love to be listened to by someone who is
genuinely interested in them. That´s you!
3. Take charge
A conversation is a two way street. If the other
person is not interested you have the option of
probing for alternative conversation topics or
ending the conversation.
It is a big mistake to wait and see what will
happen. If you are having fun make the most of
the opportunity to get to know your new friend.
If on the other hand, you are hating every moment
then politely wrap up the conversation.
There is nothing worse than awkwardly standing
there wondering what to say with someone you
don´t want to talk to. Some times people do not
click and that is a universal experience not a
failure on your part – remember that!
Peter Murphy is a peak performance expert. He
recently revealed the secret strategies all high
achievers use to communicate with charm and
impact. The same techniques you can use to
overcome shyness, develop great conversation
skills and build self-confidence.