Communication Skills Power

The art of conversation really is a wonderful skill; the simple skills to keep a conversation alive can be the deciding factor to how successful you are going to be.

Starting a conversation and maintaining a conversation really are two separate factors. As with anything there is a start, middle and an end.

Below are some tips that will help you to keep any conversation alive:

1. Don’t be a conversational bully. Avoid making people feel as if they are forced to listen to what you have to say.  Shouting and raising your voice won’t get you listened to.  It will just frustrate you and the other party involved.

2. Learn the difference between conversation and speech.  These are 2 very simple things to get mixed up on, whilst giving a speech you are being listened to. When one is having a conversation then 2 parties are involved! A conversation is word exchanges between 2 or more people.

3. Don’t shy away from phone calls. A lot of people shy away from phone calls don’t hide when the phone rings its great practice for talking face to face.

4. Questions are the key.  Yes keep the conversation a drift and flowing with questions! Questions are excellent for making the conversation continue. Even if you are really fed with the topics just act as if you are interested by generating questions.

Some excellent questions for keeping the conversation afloat are:

Who?

What?

Where?

Why?

When?

How?

Really?

Is it?

Do you like…?

These suggestions might seem rather random; however try them out in a test run and see the results.

5. Don’t be boring. If you are on a date and need to impress, then being boring is a big no-no! You won’t even know when you’re boring the other party. Try to avoid subjects that are all about you: how you are good because you did something etc.

6. Perhaps you will feel tempted to brag or turn the tables and start talking about you ex girlfriend or boyfriend. On a date this is a crime; you really can’t do this.

7. Talk about the other person. A great way to keep the conversation going is to talk about the person that you are talking to! Pay an interest into their upbringing, social values, and way of life. If you show interest to the other person then the conversation will never die!

8. Be interested but don’t be nosy. Know your limits, gossiping and extracting information from people with nosy behaviour is extremely frustrating. You most certainly won’t be getting a fan club by behaving in this manner. People won’t want to merge in conversation with you again. Nosiness and gossiping is the final wave to a healthy conversation flow.

9. Don’t pretend. Learn when the subject of conversation isn’t something that you’re comfortable or familiar with then politely change the subject; pretending that you are interested in something and know about that thing, is a recipe for failure.

10. Be lively. Talk with energy and incorporate fresh new topics to the conversation. Talk about recent news flashes, what’s happening in the world.  For example if you start a conversation on the topic of politics, it’s sure not to end anytime soon!

You should feel privileged with the gift of talking. Don’t build up barriers and unnecessary obstacles to stop you from words of conversation. If you follow the above tips then you will notice improvements in no time at all. Conversation should be fun, to interact with people and to engage in talk is a way of life. Once you can talk and keep a conversation going, you can be sure that you will be able to maintain good relations with friend and relatives.

These days, it seems all manner of people are constantly putting their foot in their mouth. How often have we heard the President, a politician, a movie star or a celebrity say something truly stupid on TV or in an interview? There are some simple steps you can take to avoid looking stupid in conversation.

1. Your appearance speaks volumes about you. If you’re in an outfit that’s hopelessly out of date or doesn’t look good at all, many people will not take you seriously. Wearing Velcro sneakers, brown socks, plaid shorts, and a striped shirt are not going to impress anyone. Remember, first impressions are lasting impressions. If people see you as an idiot right from the get-to, it’ll be an uphill battle to convince them otherwise.

2. Study proper English. You want to learn proper diction, and use it. Don’t use improper words like “ain’t” or expressions like “Whazz up?” You might sound current and hip, but you’re not going to sound smart.

3. Consider your audience. If you’re in a social setting with adults, speak in full and proper sentences, and don’t use profanity or slang. On the other hand, if you’re with children and/or teenagers, using words that are too big for them to follow can also lead to them seeing you as stupid.

4. How you behave. Flopping across the host’s couch at a party, chewing with your mouth open, burping, farting, and picking your nose are all things that will lower people’s opinion of you. Remember, body language communicates as much as your words. So, sit up straight, use proper etiquette, and follow the Golden Rule; treat other people the way you want them to treat you.

5. Stay current on the events of the world. If you start going on and on about how Hillary Clinton will be a great President, people are going to see you as very stupid. As Hillary has dropped out of the race, that would show you as being completely out of touch. That is, unless you’re going to talk about a future presidential race. If that is the case, then make that clear.

6. Be sure you brain is “engaged” before you put your mouth in motion. That is, stop and think before you say something. If you blurt out what a great actress you think Paris Hilton is, people will question not only your intelligence, but your sanity as well! Unless you’re surrounded by fellow Paris fans, think about who you are talking to, and ask yourself if saying that is going to come across as smart.

7. Stay focused on the conversation. If you stop in the middle of a sentence and change the subject of what you are talking about to something completely unrelated, people are going to see you as scatter-brained. Pay attention to what you and others are saying, and keep your statements on the topic of conversation.

8. Don’t be crude and vulgar. If you make sexist or racist jokes and/or statements, use profanity in every sentence, people are going to see you as a stupid jerk, and rightly so. None of these things are signs of intelligence.

9. Finally, don’t be insulting. If you’re having a debate about politics, the economy etc. and someone makes a good point, don’t respond by insulting them. To be so petty that you have to win every argument through whatever means you can is going to make people see you as quite foolish and stupid.

When you’re talking to people, a key to not coming across as stupid has more to do with simple common sense than anything else. Think about how you look, how you act, and what you say and how you say it. Look at other people, and ask if you see them as smart. If not, why not? And then look to avoid making the same mistakes they did.

Have you ever been faced with that tongue tied feeling of hopelessness? You most certainly are not alone. Most of the human race will have at some time become stuck for words.

How can you help to stop this from happening? Simply follow the easy steps below. This will help to ensure that this doesn’t happen to you again! Gain confidence and ensure you always know what to say.

Here are some great tips to stop that tongue tied feeling and loss of conversational skills:

1. Finish previous topics of conversation

That tongue tied feeling, more often than not can come from having a brain full of ideas, and not finishing previous topics of conversation. Make sure that you finish each and every conversation on your agenda.

Don’t leave it till your brain is a factory of unfinished topics of talk. This really doesn’t help you in making good conversation.

2. Observe before talking

Some of the more successful conversation makers are successful as they have the ability to listen, and not just to be listened to! So if you are feeling tongue tied and there’s a knot at the tip of your tongue trapping the words, sit back and watch how other people are talking!

It’s a short study period and will help you considerably in you method of approaching a conversation.

3. If it doesn’t make sense then don’t say it!

Half the time you get tongue tied, this feeling comes as you are talking nonsense that really is not relevant to express!

Make sure that the words are necessary and that the topic needs to be addressed. Just by following this simple method of untying your tongue you will maintain an audience of listeners.

4. Ignore those whose ears don’t tune in!

If their ears don’t listen then don’t be disheartened. The same way that you are struggling to be heard, there are people that struggle in the listening process! If your words are falling on deaf ears you can’t help it. Some people really are limited in thought and you can’t draw their attention span with your words.

5. Practice before you speak

Start putting in to practice the words that are in your head; perhaps you could ask a family member to sit down and listen to you before you decide to go public with the conversation.

By doing this you will have had a test run period, this will be a practice for the real thing (a stage rehearsal) helping you to focus and more importantly be focused on.

6. Before talking take a deep breath

A small thing such as taking a deep breath of fresh air before talking will help to maintain that you are able to focus and remain head strong on the topic of attention.

Half the time when you start to go off road in your thoughts and the speech starts to become difficult to come out, this is a result of not being relaxed. The process of breathing in helps to maintain that you feel more relaxed, enabling you to remain focused.

Being tongue tied and losing your words in conversation really is a result of carelessness. If you have the ability to stick to the above tips and methods of untying your tongue then you can help to make sure that you don’t get lost for words!

Try to remember that thinking about being lost for words can lead you to the reality of being lost for words. Everyone gets tongue tied, and you really can’t have lived much without having that tongue tied feeling once in a while.

Stay confident, be calm and don’t let nervous thoughts fill your brain just focus on yourself and the words that you need to express!